The Positivity Project – Switch your Goals Mindset

Highlighting moments when you rocked the hell out of 2016 instantly lifts your spirits, says hypnotherapist Chloe Brotheridge. Scroll through your photos and choose three in which you felt happy, or proud of yourself. Then, when you think of the year ahead, instead of setting future goals, say or write them in the present tense: “I am getting fitter,” or, “I am working on that promotion.” This sends a powerful, positive message to your subconscious to go forward and make them real. 

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My first book signing.

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My ‘baby’, PUIYIN W.L. PUBLISHING®, finally launched in late 2016. It took me 5 years to build this ‘baby’, and it was all worth it.

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The first novel by PUIYIN W.L. PUBLISHING®.

  1. I am working on the second sequel to Who We Were, which I am so excited about.
  2. I am working on the sequel to Made in Thailand.
  3. I am putting together the ideas and draft for the final piece to Fauna.

18. THE POSITIVITY PROJECT – ONE EMAIL TO READ BEFORE WORK (DAY 10)

Get your AM brain into gear by signing up to gohighbrow.com’s fun email-learning platform. It sends a five-minute lesson (on a huge range of subjects – money, art, tech, health) straight to your inbox each morning for ten days.

Day 10 – Wrapping It Up

From Highbrow:

Congrats, you made it till the end of this 10-day course. Now it’s time to wrap things up.

You have now made the first steps to apply the science of happiness to your life. You have not only read but also experienced the lessons and activities in this email course first-hand. But it takes time and effort to master a new skill as well as it takes time and effort to develop self-confidence.

This ten-day framework provided an intro to the topic but it needs more continuous effort to really make a lasting difference. Besides, there are a huge variety of more topics that positive psychologists and neuroscientists are researching at the moment.

Among others, there’s how to discover and use your strengths to become happier and more effective at work. There’s also a lot of research on what makes happy relationships stand out from others, how to find happiness in the moment and much more.

To end this course, you can try this a method called sentence stem completion. This exercise can be used to facilitate your personal growth. You can use this exercise to consolidate the insights you had throughout the course. Find at least 10 endings to this sentence stem:

Living happily to me means…

For example, one of my sentence stem exercises looked like this:

Living happily to me means …

… having dinner with my family.

… working on a project that makes the world a better place.

… having good food in my home.

… making a positive difference in the world.

… enjoying the company of others.

… spending some time alone.

… having someone to talk to.

16. THE POSITIVITY PROJECT – ONE EMAIL TO READ BEFORE WORK (DAY 8)

Get your AM brain into gear by signing up to gohighbrow.com’s fun email-learning platform. It sends a five-minute lesson (on a huge range of subjects – money, art, tech, health) straight to your inbox each morning for ten days.

Day 8 – Understanding Savoring

From Highbrow:

Today’s about savoring: Fully enjoying an experience or a memory. It is, as its name suggests, a sort of running the positive experience around in one’s mouth, really tasting, valuing and enjoying it. Savoring only requires us to pay attention and enjoy our experience. That can be the food we’re eating, the music we’re listening to, the comfortable feeling of lying in our bed on a Sunday morning or anything else that gives you pleasure. While mindfulness is about experiencing the present moment as it is, savoring is about the focus on the positive.

Think of a wine expert tasting an expensive glass of wine. She starts by looking at the wine, holding it against the light. She tries to notice its color and viscosity. The next step is to smell the wine; breathing the aromas in deeply. Only now she takes a sip. She rolls the wine around in her mouth in order to take in all the aromas, all the nuances of flavor. It is an indulgence and all her attention is focused on how the wine feels. After she finally swallows, she has focused intensely on the whole experience and enjoyed it thoroughly. What this wine expert just did, is what psychologists call savoring.

The key lesson is to ‘enjoy now’. We often imagine a happier future and tell ourselves things like, ‘Once I finish this project, then I can finally relax’. This causes us to focus on something that is going to make us happy in the future rather than the joy we can find in our lives right now. If we can enjoy the present, we don’t need to count on and live for the happiness that is in our future.

A decent amount of research confirms the positive impact of savoring on our happiness and satisfaction with life. People who savor frequently are also less depressed and more optimistic.

Today, take an experience and savor it for at least a few minutes. There is an infinite number of things you can choose to savor: going for a walk, reading a book, eating dinner, listen to your favorite song, playing a game… It doesn’t need to be anything unusual. Just remember that savoring is a process, not an outcome. Pay full attention, indulge with your senses. And if you want, follow this process:

  1. Slow down
  2. Pay attention to what you are doing
  3. Use all your senses
  4. Stretch out the experience
  5. Reflect on your enjoyment.

15. THE POSITIVITY PROJECT – ONE EMAIL TO READ BEFORE WORK (DAY 7)

Get your AM brain into gear by signing up to gohighbrow.com’s fun email-learning platform. It sends a five-minute lesson (on a huge range of subjects – money, art, tech, health) straight to your inbox each morning for ten days.

Day 7 – Writing a Gratitude Letter

From Higbrow:

Gratitude can help build flourishing relationships and establish new ones. When we become truly aware of the value of our friends and family, we treat them better. This can start an upward spiral, in which strong relationships give us something to be grateful for which in turn strengthens those very same relationships. That’s why today’s email is all about one of the most well-researched happiness exercise we know of. It’s writing a so-called gratitude letter. Ideally you find some time alone today (maybe about 15-30 minutes). When you’re ready, move on:

Close your eyes and think of someone who did something important for you that changed your life in a good direction but who you never properly thanked. It could be that you’re really grateful to a teacher who inspired your love of acting and who persuaded you to try for drama school when everyone else was dead set against it. Maybe you’d like to thank your boss or a colleague for helping you with a particularly tricky project at work. Or perhaps you choose to write a friend who helped you through a tough time.

In this exercise you will have the opportunity to experience what it is like to express your gratitude in a thoughtful, purposeful manner. Take your time to write a letter telling the story of what the person did for you, and how it contributed to where they are now in your life. Describe specifically what they did and what influence it had on you. Let them know what you are doing now, and mention how you often remember what she did. Make it sing!

You don’t actually have to send the letter but if you want to share the benefits of this activity with the other person, arrange for a visit with this person (but be vague about the purpose of the meeting). When you visit them, read this letter to the person. This is a powerful part of the experience and I highly recommend doing this.

14. THE POSITIVITY PROJECT – ONE EMAIL TO READ BEFORE WORK (DAY 6)

Get your AM brain into gear by signing up to gohighbrow.com’s fun email-learning platform. It sends a five-minute lesson (on a huge range of subjects – money, art, tech, health) straight to your inbox each morning for ten days.

Day 6 – Practice Gratitude

From Highbrow:

Practicing gratitude reminds many people of saying ‘thank you’ for a present. But being grateful can be much more than that. The leading gratitude researcher Robert Emmons defines it as a feeling of wonder, thankfulness and appreciation of life. His research from the last decade has shown a host of benefits; from stronger immune systems and better sleep to more happiness and better relationships.

Human beings like novelty and we adapt fast to new circumstances such as a new apartment or the last promotion. Gratitude helps because it allows us to benefit from the things we usually take for granted. There are many things in our lives, both large and small, that we might be grateful for. When we are grateful for something, we appreciate its value. And that’s why practicing gratitude on a regular basis allows us to notice the positives more and that magnifies what’s good in our lives.

But gratitude does even more good to us! It also blocks toxic emotions such as envy and resentment. You can’t, for example, feel gratitude and envy at the same time. Try to be truly grateful and at the same time envy someone for having something that you don’t have. It’s impossible, they are incompatible feelings.

If you want something to engage in, take this easy exercise: Throughout today, take notice of things you can be grateful for. Make a list of these things – no matter if small or big. And in the evening, take some time to revisit the list. You can ask yourself what your life would be like if those things were missing. And you can try to experience a bit  of gratitude for things that you probably haven’t noticed in a while.

11. THE POSITIVITY PROJECT – TAKE THE 21-DAY GRATITUDE CHALLENGE (DAY 4)

Record one thing you’re grateful for (flatmates with the same shoe size, a FaceTime chat with your mum, that free coffee in Pret – it’s all relative) each day for three weeks. Research says it can improve your mood, sleep and energy.

DAY 4 – Made in Thailand Sequel

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Once again, I would like to thank those who have purchased and supported Made in Thailand, and because of how well it is doing, I have decided to bring out a sequel, where the autobiography will have a broader focus on my life in 90’s Bangkok and much more. It is already in the works alongside the sequel to Who We Were. The sequel to Made in Thailand would not have come to plan if it wasn’t for the supportive bloggers, readers and fans. I thank you all, and hope that we can make the sequel an even better success.  

9. THE POSITIVITY PROJECT – TAKE THE 21-DAY GRATITUDE CHALLENGE (DAY 3)

Record one thing you’re grateful for (flatmates with the same shoe size, a FaceTime chat with your mum, that free coffee in Pret – it’s all relative) each day for three weeks. Research says it can improve your mood, sleep and energy.

DAY 3 – Bloggers, readers and fans

Today, I am thankful for having amazing bloggers, readers and fans in my life, because without them, my books would not be known. The last time I checked the sales for the latest book/autobiography Made in Thailand, it had surpassed my expectation, all thanks to the bloggers, readers and fans.

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As a writer/author, it is always important to remember to stay humble, no matter how big of a star we may become, because at the end of the day, the bloggers, readers and fans are the main people who will be buying the books and spreading the word. They are the ones doing the main ‘marketing’.

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Thank you to those who have been buying and supporting Made in Thailand. You have no idea how truly thankful, appreciative and grateful I am.